bump #30: no news is good news

There is no new news to report here.
But I am inclined to disagree with the saying that "no news is good news."

Nope. That's just another moronic mantra that does not apply to infertility. Same as "a stitch in time saves nine" and "a bird in the hand is worth two in the bush." Stitches suck and who wants a bird at all? I want a baby!

So, no news is not good news and it makes for a very boring bump on the {b}log.

But that's where we're at. This boring spot where TTC is a real nuisance and we're getting nowhere. But, regardless, I've been diligently tracking my temperature the last few weeks, tinkling on OPK's, (Pretty much everything short of the cervical mucus analysis because that just really freaks me out!), cutting out caffeine and my beloved pina coladas, replacing them with prenatal vitamins that make me gag and healthy smoothies. Blagh. And after all of that, I'm pretty sure I didn't even ovulate last month. So it was all for naught.

It's like my reproductive system is going on strike.
I guess I don't blame it.

And in the midst of all of this stress, everyone {ok just my mom really, oh and Frankie from Frankie Goes to Hollywood} keeps telling me to relax. And I'm sure there's some truth to that. Not like do yoga, breath deeply, meditate, and BAM! - Pregnant! But like quit hating on my uterus (that insists on housing polyps instead of persons) and stop dwelling on the worst case scenarios (like being forced to live on the street after fertility treatments bankrupt us.) Yes, that is in fact a dark place in my mind that pops up every once in a while and I have no comment as to whether or not I have been saving all my cardboard boxes for, you know, just in case!

Being told to relax isn't my favorite thing.
Relaxing feels impossible.

But what the heck, I'll go ahead and give it a try. A relaxed attitude is not a defeatist one. This is not me throwing in the towel. I suppose this is me "going to the beach and laying out on the towel." I choose to look at relaxing as regrouping, recharging, and really re-examining our route.

So September will be the month where I chillax a bit.

{Yeah, right!}

Comments

  1. Ugh, I hate the "just relax" advice- even though it comes from a helpful place, it is just not that easy to flip the switch!! Regardless, I hope September DOES bring you some rest and relaxation!

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  2. ughhhhh! I HATE the "relax. It'll happen." comment. I get that most people don't know what to say and word blather ensues, but really, if you know even a teeny bit of our story it seems pretty obvious that relaxing, or taking a vacation, or any of the other perfectly ridiculous things they say aren't going to help.

    Happy chillax month! Hopefully you can find a happy/calm/sane place while you wait for your bump!

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  3. Just so you know-- I'm right there hating on your stupid reproductive system with you. That jerk. Save me a room in the cardboard box-ville!!

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  4. I totally hear you on that one!! I think people think that that is the best advice - to relax - really because they don't know what else to say! I get so annoyed when people say that to me because no matter how much I "relax" I wouldn't get pregnant. I try to remember that they just don't know what to say! It is frustrating and you are not alone!!!

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